Childhood Lost

For most of us childhood memories have many threads of commonality. During nostalgic moments of remembrance we think of simpler times; playing in the park with youthful energy, acting out childhood heroes, hearing our mother call us in for supper, enjoying ice cream or watermelon on a hot summer night, frolicking in the winter snow, and catching fireflies at night. We had few cares to think of and were adored by countless strangers. We were the stars of our own shows, the prince or princess in our domain. Life was full of happiness.

As we grew older we enjoyed sleepovers at friends’ houses; finally falling asleep in the early morning hours, the sense of freedom our first bicycle provided, and maybe even had a childhood sweetheart. Some of us helped care for a younger brother or sister. With each passing year came more independence and new experiences, some possibly happier than others. Childhood was our time of comfort and safety.

But at some point, for some sooner than others, things changed. There was a fall from grace, a loss of innocence. We suddenly became aware of bad things, distressing things. The sadness became sadder, the loneliness more lonely, and the happiness more tempered. It was a troubling time as we struggled to adjust to this new reality. Maybe we encountered a bully, the loss of a childhood friend, or even death. Although the details of each person’s story may differ, the feeling of loss is universal. A line has been crossed, a corner has been turned, and there is no turning back. Our childhood has ended.

As the years pass by we encounter more and more of this new world. We experience things in a whole new way. Sadness becomes for real, joy becomes more fleeting, responsibility becomes more burdensome, and life simply becomes more complicated. No longer is there an obvious right or wrong; now there are shades of gray. Yet no matter how much we wish to return to the simpler times of our childhood, we can not, it is gone forever.

As children we spent a few short years wishing to be older and bigger, only to spend the rest of our lives wishing to be younger and smaller. As children some may have dreamed of changing the world, yet many discover that it is the world that changes us. Our childhood is gone and before us is a scary new world. Shall we embrace it? Will it embrace us?